So yea, giant vegetables - mainly carrots - have risen from their patches, and are converging on my flat. Of course, this poses no real threat to me, as they have no arms or legs.
Actually, that raises the question of how they're moving towards me. Which leads me neatly onto my next point: Lauren, over at Think Spin, bestowed a Happy 101 award on me. I don't know what any of this means, except there's no cash prize. However, even without a huge sack of money, I'm still pleased with this. So, why not pop over and check out her site, see who else she gave the award to, and such?
If anyone else wants a mention, why not make up an award and present it to me? You don't have to put much work into it: Just fake a huge ceremony, and maybe get a little statue made up. And hire some celebrities. Or camels, wearing little suits. That would be just splendid.
Similarly, if you really want to curry favour with me, why not submit an essay under the title "Excluding Jacobitism, discuss the extent and reasons for popular protest in eighteenth-century Scotland." The deadline is next Sunday at midnight. The 2nd prize is a special certificate, which you have to make yourself at a certificate making shop.
I have made a salad from the vegetables. I will not eat it, and it will go soggy and brown around the edges. the winning essay shall receive this salad, posted as slowly as possible to your home address.