Sunday, 24 January 2010

Why did...

This all happened a long time ago: in another lifetime. Last Autumn, in fact. Well, I think it was. Let's say it was last Autumn: it seems a nice setting, with the trees just turning yellow and such. Anyway, I'd just returned from a rather strange temporal loop where I was forced to live the life of every member of the A-team 17 times, and decided to use my new skills as a soldier-for-hire. Anyway, it seems that the scope of employment for a merc in Scotland is pretty small, so I took any job I could get. Mainly, I worked for a small-time chicken crime boss as a bodyguard. Most of my job was taken up by deterring people from asking about my bosses goals, namely his motives for crossing roads. Anyway, over time my skills seemed to fade, and I was forced to return to my old job at a chicken restaurant. Life, being made up of more coincidences than we like to give it credit for, reunited me with my old boss last week in fact, when I served him to a family on holiday from Madrid. I don't speak Spanish, but I believe I heard them joking about why the chicken crossed the road. Of course, he can't cross the road anymore. I'm just glad the constant questioning is over, and he's at peace.
 Life's funny like that. One day, you're looking after a charismatic talking chicken forced into a life of crime due to constant questioning, and the next day, you're doing something exciting, like wearing a chicken hat and using a deep-fat fryer...

2 comments:

Lauren said...

That is deep-fried irony.

Paul Blanchard said...

Thanks. I hope I get the same treatment when I'm gone...

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