Sunday, 11 December 2011

I know many of you aren't planning on getting me a Christmas present...

Family Christmas Portrait, 2011
I know that, because many of you assume I'm a rhododendron, you think I don't celebrate Christmas and would be offended if you were to give to me a gift.
 This is actually incorrect. I would not be offended if you were to buy me a Christmas present. In fact, I'm not even a rhododendron. I don't know how these rumours start.
 Actually, I know exactly how these rumours start. I spread them. I spread them like lying butter over a slice of gullible bread, sometimes coating them with a layer of jam if I so desire. The jam isn't part of the metaphor. I just like jam. In fact, that's what you could get me for Christmas.
 That or some new pruning shears.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I, also, would not be offended by a Christmas gift. Or by a dog wearing pants. Pant-wearing dogs offend some people, but not me.

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