Clown River

Good news, gentle yet impoverished reader - I have a money-making opportunity for all of you! And this time, you don't even need a saddle. You see, I've set my heart on a river, full of clowns. Like usual, there's no reason for my crazy idea - I just want to sing Clown River, to the tune of... Moon River, unsurprisingly. Anyway, I can promise that you will be well rewarded. The first person to construct me a Clown River shall be paid far more than anyone has ever been paid before for building a Clown River.

I may need serious help...