Sunday, 17 April 2011

In soviet Russia, doorbell ring you. But here, I ring doorbell. This is a terrible title, and now look how it drags on. Learn from my failures, children! NEVER FORGET!

UnforgivenI reviewed reviews of Unforgiven recently. Maybe that's why its in my head...Image via Wikipedia
I rang the doorbell.

Nobody answered, and I considered going home. But then, my training kicked in. Reaching out tentatively, I caressed the button again, sending sensual chimes throughout the house.  This time, I was answered.

A man, dressed head to toe in sheepskin, opened the door and looked at me.

“Can I help you?” I asked, continuing the tentativeness that had dominated earlier affairs.

“No.” He replied. “anyway, you rang my doorbell. I should be helping you.”

“Ok.” I replied, less tentative now, “In that case, can you give me a hand killing someone? There’s a thousand dollars in it...”

He looked thoughtful for a moment, then cocking his head to one side, he asked:

“Who are they?”

“Two cowboys.” I answered. “They cut a prostitute up pretty bad.”

"Wait... Is this just the plot to Unforgiven?” he asked.

I turned tail and fled. My tentativeness had gotten the better of me.
 I wonder why he was wearing so much sheep...

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2 comments:

Doug Stephens said...

Paul,

I want to be like you when I grow up.

Also, I don't think you are old enough to use that "Soviet Russia" line.

Paul Blanchard said...

No, I'm probably not. But pop culture has aged me prematurely, and allows me to see into the past...

And I want to be you when I grow up. the paradox is confusing...

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